You know that feeling when everything is just such a mess, you have nothing left to do but laugh because life is just that crazy??
Yep, we've definitely reached that point! Let me share one moment of frustration-induced-laughter that we had this past weekend.
I'll start by saying that Nick and I are currently debating whether our ER count should return to 0 or not...please chime in with your opinions!!
Anyway, after a rough week last week, I finally woke up Sunday morning feeling halfway decent. It was a really nice break. I made it in to church and met Nick after he finished serving in the Grid (our children's ministry) during first service.
I still felt pretty good after service ended, but the walk from the Big Room to the back door wore me out. I was pretty out of breath and kinda dizzy, so I paused right outside the door to try to catch my breath. Nick offered me a piggy back ride to our cars (in the far corner of the parking lot) and I gladly accepted!
When we reached the cars, Nick started to put me down, and that's where things got interesting. I felt Herman (my feeding tube) start to snag on something as Nick was lowering me to the ground. I let go of Nick's shoulders so I could make sure Herman wasn't caught, and in that brief moment started to fall backwards off Nick...
Nick felt me falling and did what anyone would do, tried to hold me tighter to prevent the fall...except I had already let go of his shoulders...so I kept falling backwards...until the asphalt parking lot tried to cushion my fall...
I instinctively put out my arm to catch my fall, and it worked! I smashed my left elbow and forearm into the pavement instead of my head...small blessings, right?? =P
My body being the way it is, often overreacts to unexpected stimuli, so in this case, instead of just having major pain in my arm, my entire body started shaking uncontrollably and I became extremely short of breath and dizzy. Pain can be a very potent mast cell stimulus, and that's what I was experiencing right then.
We were able to get my body slightly calmed down so we were able to assess the arm situation and decide what to do. Initially I just wanted to go home and wait it out and see how things were in the morning. Despite the amount of time we seem to spend in the ER, it is NOT one of my favorite places to be, so I wanted to avoid yet another "date."
However, once we got in the car, we decided to just get it checked out. My pain was radiating throughout my arm and I was having trouble moving my fingers, wrist, and elbow. Hey, there are SOME perks to having met my deductible back in February!
The laughter moment came in the car as we were driving to the ER. I was half crying in frustration, half laughing because SERIOUSLY?!?! We can't catch a break!! (Or did I?? Haha, pun intended! Keep reading to find out...) With everything we have going on, did this HAVE to happen?? I just started to feel better again, was having a halfway decent day, was able to get out of the house, go to church, etc. And then we were on our way to the ER just like old times...REALLY?!?!
But that's life! Things happen, there are days that just can't be put into words, sometimes there is nothing to do but laugh. And that's what we did!
Life is hard right now. We've had more than our share of tears and frustration and fear and pain and helpless moments. But at the same time, we have experienced God's grace in more ways than ever, we've learned to trust Him when we can't do anything else, we have grown closer as a couple through these rough moments, we've laughed at absolutely nothing, and we've watched a good many Indians games from the ER!
We all experience rough days, weeks, months, years, whatever it may be. And yes they are hard, but instead of just praying for it to end, we're praying to enjoy the moments. Life doesn't have to be bad just because it's hard. In the midst of this season of our lives, we've had fun, smiled, and laughed. Maybe it's not the same as if nothing was going on, but I can tell you that we certainly enjoy the good moments more because we do have hard times. So don't just wait for the rough seasons to pass, embrace that time as life given from God just as much as the good times. Find moments to smile and laugh no matter what your going through. God sees you and loves you, and that's reason enough to smile (even if it's through tears) any day!!
So, participation time, here's the ultimate question...
Do we have to reset our ER counter??
On the one hand, it wasn't an MCAS issue, so maybe it doesn't count?? It was just a routine "normal" person issue, not something related to me, so my thought is that we can keep going with our current 2+ weeks.
BUT on the other hand, we did have to make a trip to the ER. Our counter doesn't represent days I'm symptomatic (good thing, too, cause that counter wouldn't make it very far =P), but when we end up in the ER. Based on that, we did end up in the ER...so maybe we do need to reset.
Chime in with your thoughts on whether or not the Bokatopia ER counter needs to be reset!
UPDATE: Today is now Thursday, and I am happy to report that my arm is well on its way to healing. X-rays showed no breaks (yay!!) and it has been improving every day.